Predestined
by MissParanoia
Summary: A soft gasp escaped her lush red lips as an enigmatic and soulful pair of eyes met hers. The ghost of her past. A figure in her nightmares she yearned to fill her senses every night. Her once-forgotten fantasy. James Potter. Is back.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:** Yey! Here's my take on a somewhat less clichéd Lily-James fanfic. Hope you like it! 

The history/past of every character and answers on questions I know would be brewing in you mind will be answered on the following chapters. This is just a little sneak peek on the present. Btw, Lily and Sirius are already dating. In fact, they have bought a house on their own, er, manor.

_Lily's POV _are _italicized._

~~~~~~~~~

Lily gazed in her bathroom mirror with eyes, as exquisitely green as emeralds, glistening with unshed tears.

_Why,_ she asked herself. _Why now when everything is as it should be did he decide to come back now? Is it because of his desire to wreak havoc into my life as I had done to his? Is it because of revenge? _

But whatever the reason is, she knew deep inside her heart, that He had come back for her. Uncertainty crept into Lily Evan's mind while she continued to gaze blankly at her pale yet as usual, breathtaking reflection revealed in the mirror in front of her. As she was about to turn to put on her bathrobe, she noticed for the first time that her unsteady exhales of breath fogged up the glass.

_James. _

_He used to doodle our linked names on a fogged mirror every morning before giving me a sweet yet chaste kiss on my lips._

_Oh god. Is it every one's purpose to bloody remind me of Him? _

She forced herself not to shed a single tear. For she knew the moment tears trickle down her cheeks, she has enough reason to hate herself. Hate herself for being foolish. For being weak. For loving him.

_Why does only he have this strong and impenetrable hold upon me? Am I being bloody hypnotized or something? _

[F L A S H B A C K] – Yesterday, in her exclusive and luxurious office.

Her rich auburn hair twisted in a messy bun, with loose tendrils framing her alluring face, Lily hurriedly scrawled a note on a Post-it and pressed it onto the file she's been scanning for typographical errors, incorrect details and grammar mistakes. Once satisfied to some extent, she was about to press her buzzer to call for Marlene, her secretary, when said secretary burst into her office, her face flushed with suppressed excitement and glee.

"Ms. Lily, these…flowers came for you just five minutes ago." Marlene said, answering Lily's unspoken inquiry.

Lily abruptly stood up and rushed towards the dozens and dozens of red roses held by glittering crystal vases, which were carried by a couple of janitors.

"Are they from Sirius?" Lily asked, unable to contain her joy and admiration for her beau.

"No, ma'm."

"Huh? Then who are they from? Let me guess, is it from Mr. Wood?" Lily inquired, this time, incapable of hiding her frustration and irritation.

"I think the CEO has already gotten over you, Ms., 'cause he was seen escorting his newest business partner outside the building." Marlene trailed off, always freshly supplied with gossip.

"Then, who's it from?"

For some unknown reason, Lily's hand shook as she opened the card. Still, no words could possible describe the emotions surging in her veins the moment she read the note. It bore something heart achingly familiar and close to her heart..his elegant handwriting. There was no name written, but she knew it was him. Undeniably. And He knew only she would recognize it.

_James, always the conceited one. He knew I have never forgotten about him in the first place. More importantly, he knew I never will._

_It's not my fault. I needed to end it. He was smothering me. I couldn't take it anymore._

" Marlene, give me a few minutes."

With Marlene gone, she collapsed on her seat and placed her head on her hands._ Great, just when I thought I could have peace and quiet at last, here comes trouble._

[ end flashback]

She cancelled six meetings just to take a day off. A day allotted solely for thinking. _I have Sirius now. Four years of a loving and devoted, not to mention, successful and gorgeous boyfriend. And now, he suddenly decides to come home? After four long years?_

The moment news got out that she had broken up with James, her long-time and believed to be" fate-destined" boyfriend, her string of suitors got even, if possible, longer. But out of her thirty or more admirers, she chose the "forbidden" one. The partner-in-crime. The bestfriend. The blood brother. _Sirius Orion Black._

With her silk bathrobe hugging every curve in her body, she left her room and descended the stairs to the kitchen, with the very intention of talking and releasing all her problems to her trusted head of the house, who has been with her ever since she was born.

"Corazon?" She called out, almost like a whisper. With a huge burden on her shoulders, speaking is almost a heavy chore for her.

_No sight of Cora. Where is sh_e? She was about to shove open the kitchen door, when she stopped dead in her tracks and listened.

_Can it be? In her own house? I mean, in my and Sirius' house, er, manor? How dare he! _

To confirm her suspicions, she pushed open the door, feigning nonchalance. And true enough, he was there.

A soft gasp escaped her lush red lips as an enigmatic and soulful pair of eyes met hers.

The ghost of her past. A figure in her nightmares she yearned to fill her senses every night.

Her once-forgotten fantasy.

James Potter.

Is back.


	2. Reliving the Past

Heyy. I know it's been years since I last updated but here I am. _Please do note that Lily's POV is still italicized._ Serena and Nate, are, yes, caused by my addiction to Gossip Girl. And they are the children of….

Well, you just have to find that out.

This is Kristina, hoping some of the nagging questions in your head are answered. I hope.

Answers for the rest of your bloody questions will be answered on the following chapters. Boracay, by the way, is this paradise resort in the Philippines. Visited by millions of tourists every year. I myself have been there once. And it is absolutely divine!

Comments are always and forever, highly appreciated. ILY. _____________________

"James." The moment his name escaped her lips, she knew.

Her life's going to endure a 360 degree- turnabout.

"Lily." James said.

_Well, this is awkward._

"Uh, pardon me, but, I think I need to change." Lily uttered, gesturing to the still-damp bathrobe she was wearing.

"Lily, you do know, I've seen you in way less than that." James quipped, hoping to erase the consuming tension in the room. And when Lily's alluring face turned on a pink-red hue, he laughed.

Lily, on the other hand, was far from laughing especially when she saw Corazon silently shaking her head and preparing to leave. _Wait. Corazon?!? Oh merlin._

"Cora, you must know that this…creature here was referring to the time we uhmm, what was it James?" Lily told the housekeeper while desperately looking at James for some kind of support.

_Hello? I'm clutching at straws here? And I'm pretty sure I'm not doing a great job._

"Oh, yes, the summer when we went to Boracay to celebrate your birthday and you were in a yellow bikini."

_Bloody hell! Is he shaking with laughter out of my demise? _

"Yep." But she need not answer for she met by the closing of the door by a bewildered Corazon.

" God! James? What were you thinking? Corazon practically worships the ground Sirius walks on!"

"So, you're saying, you're 60 year old housekeeper has a crush on Sirius? That is well, pretty disturbing."

With his remark, Lily had to bite her lips from smiling. "No, silly, she acts as if she's Sirius's mother and she has this desire to keep us together. Sirius and I, of course."

"Oh."

"Right. So, when did you come back from Italy?" Lily asked, forgetting that she was still in her silk bathrobe.

"Last night."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"I mean, it was nice meeting you again. But really, you see my dilemma here. I need to change." Lily abruptly said while rushing to the comfort of her room.

_______________________________________________________________________

_Why? Why is here? Did he come back for me? Is his return too soon? Too late? Why am I feeling this way? Did he meet some new girl in Italy? When will he return to Italy? Does Sirius know?_

Sirius. The name of his loving fiancé jerked Lily back to reality.

The ringing of her phone also broke her dream-like stance.

"Lily. Lily Evans speaking."

"Good afternoon, Lily. I was just wondering what time you'd pick me and Nate up."

"Oh, I'm sorry, Serena. Don't worry. I'm coming. Just had the misfortune to deal with some bloody bloke."

"No, it's okay. I was just informing you that our teacher announced that we have a one-hour practice for our Drama Fest so, if you have other plans for an hour, it's okay."

" Sure. Thanks. Bye. I love you." And Lily hung up the phone.

_Great! I actually forgot I had to pick the kids up. But, well, I still have an hour left._

With the intention of avoiding James, she decided to just go to work. And hopefully, finish at least, a couple of documents before her presentation the following morning.

Half-running, she pulled open her walk-in wardrobe and picked clothes and shoes at breakneck speed. Now properly dressed, she combed her long, thick red tresses and applied mascara and lip gloss.

_Ready._

Rushing down the grand staircase of the manor, she suddenly stopped when she saw James reading the newspaper in the living room.

"James?"

"Lily. Merlin," he added, "you look great."

"Yeah right. Anyway, I mean this in the best way possible but why are you still here?

"Well, I was hoping for a chance to speak to you." James asked the one question Lily was dreading since yesterday.

"Oh. That."

"Yeah. That."

"Sure."

_Please, Dear Lord, help me. Help me end this impending doom unscathed._

Out of nowhere, James laughed. His hand was on his stomach when Lily was struck by the ugly realization. She actually said her little "prayer" out loud. Loud enough for James to hear.

"So, you're absolutely **craving** this talk, huh, Lily?

Lily, red as a tomato due to her murmured outburst, didn't dignify James's retort with a response.

"Anyway, Lily, could we talk in private? I know I've been gone for 3 years but I know this great Italian restaurant."

"Uh, no."

"But, Lily, we have three years of catching up to do."

"We do. But I also have a week of catching up to do in my office or else, I'll have a five year catching up to do regarding my job…with the CEOs.

"Aren't you hungry?

"Look, James, you're too late. You can't just come barging into my life after years and expect me to welcome you in it with open arms.

"Well, maybe, if you give me chance to explain, you would."

"I won't."

"Think Lily. What if Sirius founds out you ignored me all throughout my visit in America?"

"He'll understand."

"He will. But what if someone, ahem, gives him an idea that you ignored me because you were afraid you'd fall in love with me once again after spending time with me?"

"That is completely out of the point."

"But it is a possibility."

"Whatever."

"Let's go."

As they exited the front door, Lily was so preoccupied with the thought of a "Talk" with James that she forgot to place her foot on the last step. And well, I don't need to narrate this, but, she stumbled and was about to fall when James got hold of her arm with his calloused yet incredibly soft hands and supported Lily.

"Are you alright?"

"Well, let me see, aside from the fact that I am probably blushing from head to toe, I am peachy keen."

"Peachy keen?"

"Yep."

"Is that part of the newest vocabulary of America?"

"No, that's Lily speech."

"Cool."

Snorting, she opened the door of her chauffeured car, when James closed it and gestured to his sports car.

"You know, Potter?"

"Hm?"

"A girl like me shouldn't be exposed to too much humiliation in one day by one human being only."

His reply was a sound, throaty laugh.

Seated on the plush leather cover of his sports car, Lily felt as if she's reliving the past. _Their past._

_I used to ride shotgun on his sport cars. I always complained because he likes it with the top down. I'll complain and shout. _

_He'll shut me up by enveloping me in his toned arms and kissing me. That always works._

With Simple Plan's "I Can Wait Forever" softly playing in the car, they were both enjoying the _silence, slowly built up through the years that made it actually comfortable. _

You look so beautiful today

When you're sitting there it's hard for me to look away

So I try to find the words that I could say

I know distance doesn't matter

But you feel so far away

And I can't lie

But everytime I leave my heart turns grey

And I, I wanna come back home to see your face tonight...

Cause I just can't take it

Another day without you with me

Is like a blade that cuts right through me

I can wait, I can wait forever

When you call my heart stops beating

When you're gone it won't stop bleeding

I can wait, I can wait forever...

You look so beautiful today

It's like everytime I turn around I see your face

The thing I miss the most is waking up next to you

When I look into your eyes, man, I wish that I could stay

And I can't lie, but everytime I leave my heart turns grey

And I, I wanna come back home to see your face tonight...

I know it feels like forever

I guess thats just a price I've gotta pay

But when I come back home to feel your touch makes it better

'Til that day there's nothing else I can do

Another reason is that they were both pretty much preoccupied with almost everything.

When they reached the restaurant, Lily couldn't help but gasp at the authenticity and beauty of the place. _Trust James to know these kinds of places._

"Potter." James answered the Maitre 'D's inquiring greeting as they entered the restaurant's threshold. In other words, James booked a reservation beforehand.

_Incredible! The size of his ego. He knew I would go with him –willingly or not- no matter what._

Suddenly, Lily felt as if someone's staring at her. True enough, when she looked up, heads were turned in their direction. Ladies were gazing admiringly at James's gorgeous face while men were staring at her.

Her face burning up once more, she followed James into the back of the luxurious restaurant.

The moment Lily put down her menu to place an order; she felt James' smoldering eyes on her. And she was right.

Fearing another brush with embarrassment, she asked the first question that came to mind.

"How are you?"

"I'm fine, really. How about you?"

"I'm perfectly fine too."

"Ok, let's end this awkwardness. I missed you."

The revelation caused Lily to commit a mistake- she looked into James' enigmatic eyes.

"Oh."

"Lily, did you miss me too?

"Of course. We've been friends for like, forever." Lily covered up her mistake quickly… but James knew better than to believe her little façade.

"Lily, look at me." Lily stopped brushing off imaginary lint on her dress and turned her eyes on James.

"I'm looking."

"Do you love Sirius?"

"How dare you ask a question like that? Of course, I do."

"Then why are you getting all defensive?"

"I am not!"

"You are."

"Oh please. You act as if you've been the epitome of innocence while you were gone."

"I was."

"Sirius, or I, for that matter, didn't receive one bloody lett—What?"

"I said I was. I came to work everyday. Lily, I was actually punctual. I was burying myself in my work that I had no social life, well, at least, I didn't date anyone. A night out meant a few drinks on a bar with a few friends. I attended charity balls and everything customary to my name. But other than that, I was a muggle. Can you imagine? A pureblooded wizard like me… living a muggle's life."

"Why did you leave?"

"Why did you resort to Sirius?"

"Excuse me? I, for your information, like Sirius."

"Like? Well, that is something. I notice you didn't mention anything about love."

"Well, like is almost love, I some ways."

"How?"

"Why did you come back?"

"Wow, we're actually answering each other's questions with a question."

"I know."

"You."

"What?"

"You wanted to know the reason for my return. Now, I'm answering your question. I came back for you."

" Why?"

"I was hoping for a second chance."

"WHAT?!?"

"I love you, Lily. That is still a fact, up to now. You loved me. And you know it. And judging by your face right now, you still have feelings for me. Stop fighting it."

"No. You're wrong."

"How come, then?"

"Oh, maybe you're right. But what I feel for you? Is nothing but pity. You came back looking for me, hoping for another chance but I'm sorry to say that all your efforts are in vain."

"Lily, as I have explained to you a million times, I did all of those because I love you."

"You wanted to prove your love by hurting me?"

"Lily, please understand."

"You smothered me, James! You were like my father, but worse! An obsessed stalker is a much better comparison to you three years ago!"

"I wanted to protect you."

"How? Wherever I go, you were there. Whoever guy I talked to, you send scampering away. I had no life. I was dying of suffocation. From my dad, Petunia, work, magic and you. I was dead years ago. Sirius revived me."

When Lily stopped to catch her breath, she noticed James's hand on her own and to add to that, her face was dangerously close to James.

_Why is this happening to me? _

But she suddenly had no strength to pull her hand away, or to get away from him.

Like moth to flame, James was unconsciously pulling her in.

_Please don't tell me he's leaning in._

Lily closed her eyes to await the impact of his lips on hers when..

"Lily?"


	3. Life's Complications

_Oh. My. God. Save me._

_Everything's just perfect. Everything in my damned life is well, just…damned perfect. _

_But no, the "almighty" James Potter won't leave it like that. He wants to have his revenge, right? And I know, heck, I'm sure, he will never rest until he knows for certain that I am drowning in sorrow, misfortune and just about everything that could ruin, and is ruining, my life. _

_Thank you, God!_

Lily Evans was thinking those same thoughts the moment she pulled herself together after her little tirade. But as for Lily, James is unstoppable, isn't it?

That's why she finds herself trapped in this little, horrible predicament.

________________________________________________________________________

Like moth to flame, James was unconsciously pulling her in.

_Please don't tell me he's leaning in._

Lily closed her eyes to await the impact of his lips on hers when..

"Lily?"

___________________________________________________________________________

The sound of her best friend's voice jerked her off her trance.

"Alice!?"

"Hey Lily." she greeted her friend with light kisses on both cheeks.

And that is when the inevitable happened.

"Oh my Merlin! If it isn't JAMES EDWARD POTTER?!" Alice shouted whilst brushing aside Lily's hasty attempts at engaging her in a conversation.

Biting back a smile at Lily's desperation, James stood up to meet his old friend.

"Good to know all those years with dear ol' Frank never made you loony."

Alice punched his shoulder.

"Hey! That's my husband you're referring to!"

"Just kidding."

To say Lily was nervous is an understatement. She was beyond calming!

_Alice is slow but not dimwitted. In a few seconds, she'll realize what's happening._

With a heavy sigh, she counted the seconds before her inescapable demise.

_Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, on--._

"Hey! I get it! Lily's here. You're here, Mr. I'm-all-that. Could this be? I mean, I never thought it could happen. , whipping around to point a finger at her best friend, And you! Ms. Go-behind-my-bestfriend's-back!"

"I'm terribly sorry, Alice."

"James has come back for good, hasn't he? And you didn't even bother to let me in your little secret?!? You should be ashamed, my so-called bestfriend."

_Right. When I said my best friend isn't dimwitted, I was wrong. SHE IS DOWNRIGHT STUPID!_

_But still, the situation favors me. _

_Play along, Lily._

"You are so right! Right, James?"

But when she turned around to glare at James, her eyes were caught by the scene in front of her.

_Great. Emily has decided to grace us with her presence._

Emily was one of James' many ex-girlfriends.

Let's just say Emily's possessiveness around James is quite overwhelming. So, you must imagine what happened when James finally admitted to Emily that all those time, only Lily was in his heart.

She wasn't only devastated. She planned for a sadistic and agonizing revenge.

But she failed, because Lily has something Emily will never have – the Marauders.

_PERFECT! _

_James is laughing at something that two-faced, backstabbing, slutty creature said._

_Emily put her hand on my James' arm. _

"My dear Lily. You do know what you look like when you're jealous, right?"

"I, for one, dear Alice, am not jealous!"

"Then why are your eyes narrowed like slits? Why are your hands balled up in fists? And why, oh why, are you turning freakin' red?"

"I just…don't know what to do." Lily said with her hands over her red-stricken face.

"Do what your heart tells you to do."

Lily looked up.

_Alice takes everything as a joke. Then why would she advice me to do something so clichéd? So silly?_

Lily suddenly straightened up.

"How do I look?"

"Like a million dollars."

She marched up to James' side and linked her arm with his.

And with a frozen smile, spoke to Emily. "Hi Emily. I haven't seen you for a long time. How are you?"

Emily with a sneer on her face replied, "Just great."

"How are you and Doug?"

"Oh please, Evans. Let's end this customary pretending."

"Whatever do you mean?" Lily retorted while battering her eyelashes to further irritate her verbal opponent.

"See, I was catching up with James when you suddenly showed up and spoiled everything. Do James a favor and stop following him like a stray dog."

James grimaced.

Alice, on the other hand, stood right behind James. She was bracing herself for the fight that was about to happen.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're the one who's stalking James like an obsessed, psychotic fly."

"I am so not!"

"Please don't tell me you even hired a private investigator to track him out."

"Y-y-you are such a l-liar." Emily was stuttering, knowing she was about to lose for the millionth time.

"You did, didn't you?"

At this point, Emily was hyperventilating. To be humiliated in front of James!

"How brainless can you be?!?" Lily added.

Lily was about to say more but the agitated Emily walked out the restaurant.

Now,Lily directed her suppressed fury at James. But this time, the fury was not so-suppressed anymore.

"You! What do you think you're doing?!"

"ME?! Lily, look around."

And our female protagonist did look around, only to find the eyes of everyone in the restaurant on them; some were murmuring amongst each other, most of them were well, laughing.

_How can these people have the audacity to laugh at my demise?_

_They are so pitiful. _

_Right. I'm the pitiful one._

_PLEASE LORD. KILL. ME. NOW._

The ring of her phone, once again, gave her a slap to reality.

The call is from her niece, Serena.

"Yes,dear?"

"Are you on your way? I'm sorry if I'm bothering you but it's our school's closing time already."

"Oh I'm sorry. And yes, I'm on my way. Give me five minutes."

She hang up and was about to say goodbye to Alice when she realized she's gone.

"Great! My lack of common sense has driven my best friend away."

"Well, she was going to say goodbye but you were on the phone. And I quote, 'I know better than to disturb her 'coz she's like a bloody dragon when in the phone.'"

"Could this day get any worse?"

"Lils, you just said that thought out loud."

"I was meaning to."

And with a hurried trip to retrieve her bag and coat, she left James sitting there with an agog expression.

Outside the restaurant and all the expectant faces of the diners, including James, she was able to breathe properly and think straight.

_So, I left my car at home. Calling the chauffeur to pick me up and then head to Serena and Nate's school will take too long._

Just then, a taxi rushed past her.

_Of course!_ , she slapped her forehead, _hail a cab!_

_But Sirius told me never to ride cabs because it's far too risky._

_Sirius._

She chided herself for not missing Sirius the whole time she was with James. But then again, Sirius hasn't called for two days.

_Is something wrong? Maybe he's just waiting for me to make the next call. _

_But Sirius is never like that._

But she knew that if she called first, or if he calls, for that matter, she needs to explain. And she so does not want to have a confrontation or even questions from her beau.

_Life is confusing._

Murmuring a short prayer, Lily wished that she could hail a cab and fast, seeing that it's a rush hour. And well, her beauty made that possible.

______________________________________________________________________

Inside the gates of her nephews' school, she felt weird. She felt as if she has and will never belong here.

And quickly, she brushed those thoughts aside.

_Of course I will never fit here. I studied in Hogwarts for seven years!_

_Hogwarts. My true home. _

_But now, I'm on my path to forgetting it. The same way it abandoned me._

"Ms. Evans? Or is it Mrs. Black already"

"Still the same Ms. Evans, Principal Waldorf." Lily took her hands and air-kissed the principal's cheeks.

"I presume you're here to pick up your nephews."

"Yes. Uh, where are they."

"They're in the playground right next to the auditorium."

"Thank you. It was nice meeting you again, Principal."

"You too, Ms. Evans." "And good luck."

Lily was walking towards the playground when she heard the principal say something incoherently.

But when she turned around to ask her what it was, the Principal was now walking away.

_O-kay._

While walking, she was reminiscing about the day's past events and wondering why the arrival of a young man turned her whole life upside down when she heard, "Lily! Lily!"

"Hey you guys.", she said while giving both Serena and Nate hugs.

"Did you know that James has come back from Italy?" Nate asked.

" Yes and how – "

And just when she thought she left James at the restaurant for good…

"And that he's here!"

"Yeah! With us!" Serena added.

"WHAT!??"

Lily felt a light tap on her shoulder.

_Oh god._

" Hey Lils."

To all my readers, (I do hope I still have some.) I'll try to write the next chapter after I get at least 5 reviews. I'm not really confident of my writing skills right now since I'm pretty preoccupied with everything. But reviews will totally help me keep going with the story. So, ciao! :)))))


	4. Sirius' Rightful Place

_Why does life always throw jokes at me like I'm some freakin' clown?_

"YOU!?! What the hell are you still doing here?" Lily, try as she might, wasn't able to suppress the torrent of words she flung at James.

But James shrugged them all with a smirk. "Language, Lily. We're surrounded by kids."

Gnashing her teeth, Lily grabbed Serena and Nate's hands and walked off to the school's main entrance.

"Lily, wait up!"

James took hold of Lily's arm and swung her to face him.

"Now what, Potter?!"

Turning to face the kids, James said, "Nate and Serera, could you give us a few minutes, please?"

"No! Stay exactly where you are. I have nothing to say to him."

"Lily, you left abruptly when I invited you for lunch. This is the least you could do."

Aware of the tension between the couple, Nate piped up. " Sure, James, I was meaning to show Serena a new game…in the playground."

"But, Nate.." Serena, who was always supportive to Lily, countered.

"Now, Serena." Nate said from his place halfway to the playground.

The moment her nephews were gone, Lily shouted with every word dripping with sarcasm, "Wow, only the mighty James Potter could do that even to my own nephews. So, did you want some time with me to make me bow down to you or something?" Lily exclaimed.

"No. You know I never wanted to do that."

"Oh really, Potter?"

"Lily, listen to me."

"Sure James. You have my complete and undivided attention." Lily answered with a roll of her eyes, "Since I have nothing important left to do, like I don't know, my job?"

"Lily, I never wanted to hurt you in any way."

"Will you stop saying my name?"

_Because it still sends shivers down my spine in a way only you can._

"I love you. I have and will never stopped."

"So, you loved me so much, that you have no choice but to smother me?"

"Yes."

"I don't understand."

"I can't explain. But know this, I'm always by your side."

"Gosh, James, I feel so lucky."

"But in due time, I'll explain. And you'll see."

"No one cares. Leave me alone."

With her chest rising up and down due to the impact of every word she heard from James, she ran back to the playground. But once safely hidden from James, she opened her bag and checked her phone.

_5 messages. From Marlene._

_2 messages. 3 missed calls. From Sirius._

She chastised herself for once again, forgetting Sirius. Heck, she even forgot he had a boyfriend. And she figured that once James gets on the next plane back to Italy, everything will return to normal. To her life again.

Lily was pulled out from her reverie by the ringing of her cell phone.

_Sirius._

"Hey Honey. I missed you."

"Hey Sirius. So, tell me, how's the business trip going." Lily struggled to put on a smile on her words.

"Awfully dismal, of course."

"I'm sorry to hear that. Why? Are you alright?"

"Of course, I am. It was just that you weren't here with me."

"Same here, honey."

"But don't worry, I'm back."

"You're b-back?"

"Lily, is something going on? Why do you sound upset? Don't you want me to come home?"

"I do. Of course I do. I was just..taken by surprise."

"So, where are you?" Sirius asked with unmistakable excitement…and love laced in his voice.

"Here at Serena and Nate's school. I was just coming to pick them up."

"Okay. Expect me in 5 minutes. I love you. Bye."

"But Si-"

Not knowing what to do, Lily did the only thing she could muster her energy to do…break down and cry.

_I'm gradually falling into this trance. And I don't care._

Numbness is slowly creeping into her bones. And she doesn't want to do anything about it.

_I just want to forget all about this damn mess and die. I don't deserve this. _

_Sirius doesn't deserve this._

She was so consumed by her anguish that she didn't hear the faint footsteps of Serena and Nate coming towards her.

Seeing her aunt's condition, Nate knelt and took Lily's hand.

Comforted by the warmth of Nate's hand, Lily looked up with her tantalizing eyes brimming with unshed tears and nodded.

"Lily? We're here for you."

Embarrassed to be seen in this kind of state, Lily stood up and brushed the remaining tears away.

"Sirius is going to be here any minute. Let's go."

_But James?Where is he?_

"He told us he wanted to honor your wishes this time." Nate answered her unspoken inquiry.

"Oh…I mean, good."

_Good? That's all I have to say? What's happening to me?_

Serena's shout, however, left her frozen while the kids ran.

"SIRIUS, SIRIUS, SIRIUS!"

"Oh hey, S & N! Still gorgeous as always.."

Serena' reply was a giggle.

Sirius scooped the kids up into his arms while promising them of his treats from England.

But when Sirius gaze dropped on her girlfriend, looking shaken and rooted to her spot, he dropped the kids and ran to Lily.

He kissed Lily's forehead before asking her, "What's wrong?"

Plastering on a huge smile, she lied. "Just playing with you, honey. Welcome back! I missed you!"

"Oh, really, huh? Come here, you." With that, he captured Lily in a passionate kiss.

After what seemed like forever, he broke the kiss and teased, "Now, still playing with me?"

"Nope." Lily answered with a grin.

_I forgot how much I adore, I mean, love, Sirius. My boyfriend._

She took Sirius' hand with hers and walked towards Sirius' car.

"Let's go, guys." She called to Serena and Nate.

Unbeknownst to them, James was just inside his sports car, with the windows down, when he caught sight of the lovely scene between the two. And it seriously broke his heart in two.


	5. The Beginning of the End

_**A few days later..**_

Just right after his return from Italy, Sirius promised to himself that he'd devote less time on his work and focus more on his fiancée. It's just that he's been finding it hard to understand or even have a few minutes of Lily's time, for she is either working or too tired to talk.

To say the least, Sirius is worried.

"Honey?"

Sirius's voice ended her dream-like reverie.

'Yes?'

"Are you alright?"

"Of course, I am. Why would you think otherwise?"

"Nothing. It's just that you've been acting kinda distant and preoccupied these couple of days. Is it something from work?"

Torn between the desire to cut the conversation short or confess. Lily did the next best thing- she lied.

"Uhm, yes."

Sirius, having known Lily for years, knew something was indeed wrong. So he took both of Lily's hand into his and said, "I wish you would learn to trust me enough to tell me what bothers you. I can't read minds, can I?"

"Of course."

But Lily can't take anymore of the web of lies she has trapped herself into; she turned away from Sirius' anxious face and excused herself saying, "I have to go."

She turned away so abruptly she didn't notice the pain and confusion Sirius' eyes betrayed.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_**Readers, I am so sorry for taking too long before updating 'Predestined'. But I'll try to update everyday if I receive at least 5 reviews for this chapter. So, help me. Give me some inspiration. **__****_


	6. UNFATHOMABLE

Okay, so I'll try to make this chapter an explanation of why James had gone to Italy. && I'll try to make it as unrushed and as detailed as possible. Then, I'll try to explain, answer some of your questions in the next chapter. Thanks, Jessicats!

_Lily's POV – _

_**Alice's POV -**_

_**FLASHBACK**_

"No, I like this color." Lily half-whined to Alice, motioning to a tan cashmere sweater.

"Lily, are you blind or something? That will totally clash with Sirius's eyes. Remember, his eyes are gray not hazel like that of James."

"Whatever. I'm buying this."

Alice has been constantly badgering Lily for a long-postponed shopping trip but _**"Lily, being the workaholic that she is, always refused.**_**" **So right now, arguing with Lily in person, not on the phone for a change, was…different. It's as if Lily needed, no, longed for this time alone with Alice. Heck, Lily practically begged Alice to reschedule a meeting she will be having this afternoon. And she wondered why.

_On the other hand, _

Lily can't fathom why she feels this way. Why she feels safe. _No, not safe, but free_. Free at last. It's as if she was drowning in an ice-cold ocean and she needed salvation. _No, that's too exaggerated. But oh, how true! _She needed a hand to pick her up and carry her away from her miserable state.

Lily feels suffocated. _Threatened_, though she can't explain why. She knows she's been suffering for far too long and she needed this_, deserved this_, this break from everything. _Freedom._

But Lily's so-called "freedom" was short-lived.

"Oomph!" Lily, in her haste to pay for the sweater before Alice stops her, has bumped into a tall man, with her would-be purchase on the floor.

"Here, let me help you up." The man with a disturbingly familiar, rich voice offered.

Lily's head snapped up.

"JAMES?!"

"Yeah, babe?"

"Why the BLOODY HELL ARE YOU HERE? OF ALL PLACES?!"

"Is it wrong for a man to coincidentally see her fiancée in a shopping center? In London, no less?", James Potter asked with his trademark smirk plastered on his face.

" Yes. Especially if the man has been "coincidentally" bumping into her fiancée almost thrice this week!"

"Really, Lils? Is that what you think?"

"CLEARLY!" At this point, Lily has attracted the attention of almost half of the people in the boutique. "JAMES, TELL ME THIS, ARE YOU STALKING ME?!?"

"Of course n--!" But Lily's expression cut his reply mid-sentence.

With his hand touching Lily's face, he looked at Lily and said in his sincerest voice, "What if I tell you that I am doing this mainly for you? For your protection?"

"Oh yeah? Then get this, I don't need your protection. In fact, James, I don't need you anymore. It would be a welcome relief if I don't see your face "coincidentally" anymore." Lily said this in hushed tones, but her eyes, and her uneven, shallow breathing were evidences of the anger she felt.

"Goodbye, James." With a turn of her heel, Lily left. And James knew she was intending to leave his life for good. But he won't let that happen.

He caught Lily's wrist and turned her so that their heads are almost touching.

"No."

"Yes, James. I need this."

"Lily, this is for your own good."

"If it is, then why am I not feeling that way? If that is even your real intention?"

"Believe me. Lily, I love you."

"I know you do. But you yourself have changed my mind. James, listen to me. You're suffocating me. Wherever I am, I can always count to find you there. It was sweet and charming for the first few months but a year of it is bothering me. Whoever guy I talk to, I can always bet on you sending them scampering away. Why, James? If you really love me as you claim you do. Why?"

"I can't explain it to you. I'm sorry." James started to encircle Lily's waist with his hands, but she shrugged him off.

"Go away." With these words, she ran away.

After a few days, Lily received a letter saying James left for Italy to pursue his career in law there.

_**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -END OF FLASHBACK- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -**_


End file.
